Saving Brittany

I'm not sure how many of you have teenagers, but I have a teenage daughter.  She is 16, strong, amazing, funny, pretty and smart.  She is however, her own worst critic, constantly critiquing herself for the smallest things from her legs to her hair.  I am at war for herself worth with her inner critic.  It is truly a paradigm.  My daughter doesn’t do drugs, isn't interested in the next party and isn't boy crazy....so, you might ask what I have to worry about?  My daughter has an even greater evil...herself.  This might actually be the worst kind of war because it is all internal.  There is nothing to protect her against.....but her own mind.  I can't put her in rehab or ground her from herself.  I can't take her inner critic away from her.  This voice in her head that feeds her this constant negative information is more powerful and controlling than any boy or any drug.  It is all consuming and dangerous.  This inner critic tells her that she can't be smart, or pretty, or successful.  It tells her she is fat, and that she can't do math.  It beats on her when she eats, and berates her when she doesn’t.  She is at war with an enemy she knows intimately but recognizes as an ally.  This inner critic, this enemy ally....tells her she isn't worthy to be alive, or breathe, or have friends.  I hate this inner critic, because I have yet to find a way to win this war.  Constant positive reinforcement for years does little to no good, success with school, friends, driving; language....does not defeat this enemy.  I'm not sure we realize just how destructive we are to ourselves.  Our frenemy the 'inner critic' provides a minute by minute assessment of everything we do.  That voice in your head can be an ally, or a destructive force equal to drugs and addiction, maybe worse.  I fight every day for my daughter to overcome her inner critic.  If you are like me and have a beautiful daughter who deserves an ally, not a frenemy in her inner critic, share your story and just maybe together we can learn to beat this enemy and win this war for our daughters.